Your First Day of Classes...

Meeting new people on the first day of school is always a trying experience... here are some tips on how to avoid talking to anyone on those first days of classes to ensure that no one bothers you for the rest of the term!

Fraternizing: to be avoided at all costs.
(photo found by googling)

1. Stare intently at your laptop screen before class starts. Whenever anyone comes near, close it slightly so that no one can tell that you're really on Facebook. Shifty eyes are recommended but optional.
2. Sit at the end of the row and put your bag in the seat next to you. If you're in a lecture hall, make sure to give dirty looks to anyone who tries to move past you.
3. Sit in the back corner and avoid eye contact at all costs. Using the aforementioned computer technique can be substituted for texting everyone on your contact list how bored you are or playing Angry Birds.
4. Make sure to never raise your hand. The professor might get the mistaken impression that you enjoy their class.
5. Make sure to not even look like you're raising your hand -- fixing your hair or stretching can easily be mistaken for wanting to communicate.

...
But seriously, one of the best things about college is meeting new people and making friends from different places. If you don't like meeting people for the sake of meeting people, think about the benefits. Networking in class might help you get a job someday, and it will certainly help you find people to study (or take group exams) with. Studies show that students tend to retain material more effectively when surrounded by peers, and here are 6 benefits of study groups. Plus, finding out that you have a group project due mid-quarter and realizing that you have no one to do it with is not fun.

My solution for everything

Start with not doing any of those 5 things above (except playing Angry Birds is okay). I like to wear something that says something about me -- "I love your Batman shirt/backpack/hat/merch" is a great conversation starter because I either learn something about the other person or share something about myself. (Well, that and I happen to own large quantities of Batman shirts and sometimes it's harder if I don't want to wear one). If you don't end up becoming BFFs with your new acquaintance, at least you had a great conversation about the new episode of Doctor Who, right?
If you're like me and you're not a morning person but have early morning classes, I recommend coffee (lots and lots of coffee). And who knows, you might meet someone to complain about Monday mornings with.